This morning was busy and a little unorganised, the children were all supposed to be doing their usual jobs and cleaning their rooms. I have trusted Buzz with the cleaning of his own room for a while now. Which is fair enough as he is ten years old.

After all the older children had left for school I decided to check Buzz's room. I could tell from the hallway that I wouldn't be impressed. My temperature started to rise as my anger grew. His punishment for an untidy room is that the TV and Nintendo are taken away or given to another sibling for a while. I started to pull at the electrical leads to dismantle the Nintendo when I realised I was unable to sort out the complicated maze of cables. Now more frustrated I started to clean.

As I cleaned and tidied I grumbled and winged about Buzz's inability to fulfill this menial task. I straightened the books on his bookshelf and added a few from the floor. One in particular stood out, "my prayer journal." I placed it with all the other books and continued with my cleaning frenzy. Buzz's room finished, I went to the younger boys' room for an inspection and shock horror it was just as messy.

As I began my work again I could feel the Holy Spirit speaking to me to go back and read the first page of Buzz's prayer journal. I thought it over and decided to finish the boys room first and then read it. Finally I went and sat on Buzz's bed and opened the journal to the first page that he had written in. I read the most beautiful prayer about how he is made in a unique way and how he is just the way that God wants him. Then there was a cute child like conclusion that prayed for all Australians.

I felt the Lord's gentle voice say to me, "Would you have cleaned your room any better when you were ten?" No way would I have cleaned it, I loved mess as a child. Maybe I was expecting a little too much from my boy who was probably doing the best job that he was capable of.

There I was thinking about how self consumed Buzz was and how he is unable to clean his room, while I was grumbling and angry. I was the self consumed one going on about a job that is normally enjoyable and one I often do. The biggest conviction in all of this was that Buzz knows who he is in God and that his heart is not self consumed for he mentioned around eighteen million Australians in his prayer.

Though Buzz may be incapable of meeting my expectations, he is certainly fulfilling God's. Maybe my TV should be taken out for a while!!